Good morning everyone and welcome, once again, back to the Breakroom! We have finally made it to the weekend, and I hope you are all prepared for Halloween since we are officially one week away from the big deal!
I don’t really dress up or go to any parties these days, but I do still love the holiday. I have plenty of spooky decor all around the house, I get into the themed movies and television shows, and am all for using Halloween flavors in my cooking. Stay tuned for a special post this next week on what I like to give out to trick-or-treaters. But you didn’t come back today for my party ideas, despite my great recommendations, you came to hear what happened with everything at the office following last week where Michael hit Meredith with his car.
We left learning that it was lucky Meredith had been hospitalized because she had been exposed to rabies and would have most likely died if she hadn’t come in. This motivates Michael to make sure that each and every person know that rabies has a cure and has been largely eradicated. As he phrases it, “a woman should not need to be hit by a car to learn she has rabies.” Now this is true but in reality, if you ever feel you could have been exposed to rabies you should seek medical attention right away. There is a treatment that can be done soon after to ensure you do not develop symptoms. As Dwight explained, once symptoms set in it is too late and it is considered fatal. Thankfully, rabies from dogs has been reduced significantly due to routine treatments, although bats are one of the more common carriers1.
Michael decides rabies is in need of a big charity event to spread word that rabies has been cured; this is interesting as typically charities are done for diseases that need to be cured. Michael’s fundraiser is a big 5k run known as “Michael Scott’s Dunder Mifflin Scranton Meredith Palmer Memorial Celebrity Rabies Awareness Pro-Am Fun Run Race for the Cure.” If you would like to show off your support you can still pick up your own t-shirt which was given to those of us participating in the event. We don’t get a ton of money donated, despite Stanley’s best efforts he isn’t able to get sponsors. Phyllis does her best to support by putting together a rabies quilt (of only three squares) which I was very impressed with her attention to detail. I would love to to learn to make blankets or quilts because I routinely see very cool fabrics that would be perfect for such a project. And there are those who are not enthused with the run at all, namely Kevin who thinks it is unfair that he needs to be forced to run for a fake charity. I was really excited to get out of the office early and enjoy the weather, taking a nice run through town.
Michael wishes they had raised more money, as the $700 they raised was mostly from him and Jan, and the rest of the money aspects do not go according to plan. For starters, he was excited to present the money in the form of a giant check which is actually another expenditure ($200). I personally always wondered what you are supposed to do with the giant check, like do you sign the back? I’m assuming the giant check is just symbolic and it is accompanied by a real check, but that would be slightly depressing because I enjoy thinking about someone heading into a bank with one of those giant checks. On top of the check itself, Pam was not able to line up a “rabies doctor” to stop by and pick up the donation. Supposedly the amount of money is too small, although I would imagine most healthcare organizations would have someone who would be willing to come out to collect a check. Luckily, Jim recalled a company where you could hire a nurse for a short period, although that would cost more money. And yet it was Dwight whose idea was the most ridiculous in that he thought the money would be used for bat birth control. I think he still hasn’t forgotten the time the bat got into the office and was able to cause such trouble for him as he tried to catch it.
Finally we got to Michael’s launch of the fun run! He had a very moving speech, with an unfortunate picture of Meredith. He lets us know that as many as four American’s die a year from rabies. I looked into this claim and the interest has various mentions but the main consensus is that there are fewer than 10 deaths every year so his claim is still accurate. That being said, this number is for the United States but there are many third world countries where rabies is still rampant and thousands of people die every year globally. Michael has his giant check and was able to present it to a familiar face, Elizabeth who had been the stripper that was hired for Bob Vance’s bachelor party way back. I don’t think Michael has figured out she wasn’t really a nurse and was simply hired to come in costume, but it cheered Michael up. Of course, the original $700 we raised is now only $340 after the various purchases required to make this moment happen.
And with that, the 5k was officially underway and everyone was off! Having not done a marathon before, it was interesting seeing everyone prepare in their own ways. Toby has done marathons before, so he was busy stretching and getting warmed up which certainly sounded smart. Andy Bernard evidently gets chaffed nipples so he had to apply tape to his nipples to protect them. I suppose this sort of injury shouldn’t surprise me but it certainly does not sound pleasant. Michael’s big idea was to load up of fettuccine Alfredo right before the run but unfortunately he misunderstood what it means to carb load. Per Runner’s World, it actually means to start eating more carbs each day the week of run to have more carbohydrates in your reserves in general. Additionally, rather than eating a ton of food moments before the run they often advise using the different gels or chews throughout the race to replenish your stores2. For those of you who decide to partake in a marathon one day, definitely research to ensure you are preparing for the event properly and safely.
Dwight and Angela disappeared at one point during the run, evidently they have been arguing because Dwight is responsible for killing her cat, Sprinkles! I guess he thought killing it would be the humane thing to do; just going to mention this, do not euthanize someone’s pet for them. Pam and Jim were also taking their sweet time with the marathon, they spent the entire time at the end of the race, so I didn’t event see them until the end. Again, they are all giggly like they have some sort of secret. Then we had Creed, Oscar, and Stanley take a cab to the finish line, after drinks, so they really were not going to commit to the run. In the end, Toby was the first one to the finish like and Michael was essentially last. Despite his best intentions of supporting those with rabies, by choosing to neglect drinking water he finished the race only to be brought to the hospital for severe dehydration. Always drink your water folks; especially when exercising but just in general you should be staying hydrated!
In the end, this event went about as one would expect a Fun Run hosted by Michael Scott to go. If nothing else, they did raise a bit of money and Meredith ultimately forgave Michael because he tried so hard to show he felt sorry for what happened.
And that, my friends, was the Breakdown of the office events this week! I’ll be sure to invite you to a Coffee Break this next week for some Halloween tips. Until then, has anyone here ever partaken in a marathon? Do you have tips for people who are thinking of joining their first one so they can properly prepare? Let us know in the comments!
Until next time, I’ll see you around the Breakroom!
- (2024, June 5). Rabies. World Health Organization. Retrieved October 24, 2024, from https://www.who.int/news-room/fact-sheets/detail/rabies#:~:text=Rabies%20is%20a%20vaccine%2Dpreventable,%2C%20cats%2C%20livestock%20and%20wildlife. ↩︎
- (2024, May 3). Your guide to carb loading on marathon week. Runner’s World. Retrieved October 24, 2024, from https://www.runnersworld.com/uk/nutrition/diet/a27178213/when-to-start-carb-loading-marathon/ ↩︎
