Author: Nathan Westerberg

Posted in The Office

The Office: Season 3, Episode 4 “Grief Counseling”

Posted on by Nathan Westerberg

Good morning everyone and welcome back to the Breakroom! If you are like me then this has hopefully been a pretty decent week thus far. Nothing too eventful or stressful, plenty of rain to help nourish the grass, and perhaps had some close encounters with friends in a rousing game of Dungeons and Dragons. This is why our topic for today is so interesting for such a mellow week; we will be discussing the topic of grief counseling! Why did that come up when we talk about happenings at the office? Well, I am glad you asked because you wouldn’t believe what Michael has been up to!

On the date in question, things started off with the norm. With Jim no longer here to entertain us with his “hilarious” pranks towards Dwight, Michael has taken it upon himself to entertain us with his jokes. He built a small wall of boxes of paper to do the ol’ “walking down the stairs” gag and commenced to head on down to the “warehouse” to bring back various items. Dwight seemed to be the only one who really found it entertaining, but I suspect that after his attempted coup last week he is going all out to show his support. But then it was Pam who ultimately turned this gag around on Michael by requesting a fresh cup of coffee from the warehouse. And Michael truly did crawl on his stomach to get a cup of coffee from the kitchen to maintain this joke. It was when Pam kindly requested milk and sugar to go along with it, that I believe Michael decided his jokes need less workout.

I thought this was going to be the highlight of the day, but I was not prepared for what happened next. Evidently, Jan had given Michael a call to let him know that his former boss, Ed Truck, had just died and she wanted him to know. He came out and let us all know and that really should’ve been the end of it. Then Kelly came running up to give him a hug and extend her condolences towards the loss. I could just see the realization dawn on his face because he loves it when people pay attention to him and make a deal about what is going on with him. It was then that he started to go around and talk about the loss, hoping to get more hugs and condolences. This might have been his payback to Pam because naturally, he zeroed in on her first. That really should have been the sign that today was not going to be as straightforward.

Just to put everything in perspective, Jim did give me the lowdown of what they did at Stamford for the day. The biggest event was that Jim was assigned Karen’s project supervisor for the day. It seems she was tasked to complete a pricing list for a client and Josh decided to scold her in front of the rest of the department and then assigned Jim to her. Now I certainly do not want to point fingers, but this move did sound a bit sexist in my opinion. She simply hadn’t had the chance to complete this task so a man needs to be brought in to watch that she gets it done? I don’t think so; she wasn’t able to get it done yet but she will work on that next, it truly is as simple as that. I know Josh seems like this amazing manager but he does sound like the micromanaging type and likes to exert his his authority. Don’t be like this, a leader should be able to inspire their staff, not see them as their automatons there to do as they are told. Thankfully, it sounds like Jim also thought the request was a bit odd and in no way was out to make Karen feel worse than she already did. Actually, they ended up spending most of the day tracking down her favorite chip, Herr’s Salt and Vinegar. I guess they did get the pricing list completed eventually, but not before spending hours looking for this chip all over the city and even into Canada. Jim and Karen sound like they are really getting along these days, which is good since he had left behind his close friends behind when he moved.

Now keeping in mind that this was the biggest issue Stamford had to face, lets regroup with Scranton’s day. Always one ready to throw a wrench into anyone’s day, Creed decided to come talk to Michael about the loss of Ed Truck. Turns out, Creed is far more knowledgeable over the exact details over his cause of death than anyone else. We went towards naturally causes but in reality he was “drunk as a skunk” and drove his car under an eighteen wheeler resulting in him being decapitated. Creed seemed to think that humans can survive for several hours after losing their head, but that is not true. He was thinking of a chicken so please pass along that little tidbit. This was certainly the moment that Michael began to spiral, as these sorts of things often do with people. These moments tend to remind people that not everyone gets to die of old age and it can often be quite sudden with no rhyme or reason. We really start to see Michael latch on to this entire incident, even though he actually was not truly a big fan of Ed when he worked for him. But he now wants to try to honor him with ideas like a company holiday or even a statue of Ed. The statue ultimately became a robot at three-quarters his size with a six foot extension cord. Should a robot ever become sentient, we would want the ability to overpower them. But Michael starts going around the office trying to to get everyone as riled up as he is, including trying to implement the five stages of grief.

Many of us are familiar with the five stages of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. These have held true for many years, but there have been changes and there is actually a seven stage model often used now. These seven stages are: shock and denial, pain and guilt, anger and bargaining, depression, the upward turn, reconstruction and working through, and finally acceptance and hope. These changes are more meant to reflect that while we might all process grief and loss very similarly, there are certainly times where they might vary. Additionally, each individual is different and we might approach a loss differently than someone else so these stages are designed to help walk us through the loss. The goal of these models is also meant to help explain what we are feeling in order to better process our emotions and to ultimately deal with the loss than burying those emotions down. Some companies do offer benefits for employees which can include grief support so it is highly recommend you review what your company can offer. Otherwise, you should find someone to speak to and work with these feelings. Besides such counseling services you might go to your personal therapist, friends or family, or even a spiritual leader. Loss and grief can last with us for many years and no one should feel ashamed for needing outside help in learning to deal with these emotions. For a better breakdown of the seven stages of grief, I highly recommend reading the article with Healthline that I did in how they break down these stages1. While I do believe it is important for us to be reminded that we do need to process grief, in no way should you try to force your own emotions onto another. We process loss differently, and sometimes one person might simply be more emotionally invested than someone else. Michael should’ve actually had a professional come in to speak to everyone, but he the type of leader who believes that he truly can meet any need his staff might require. While there are some leaders who do have the skills to accommodate many roles, they would typically go through specialized training and certification to be able to do so. If you are not qualified to do so, you might want to leave formal grief counseling to an expert.

Michael’s big idea, is to actually take turns discussing instance of personal loss. The game works by tossing a ball between one another and when you have the ball, it is your turn to share your story and you felt during that instance. I have certainly seen this done before, but it is usually for instances like brainstorming sessions. Now, this entire process resulted in some pretty odd stories. First of all, it seems that Dwight originally had a twin he was to be born with. The other twin was actually resorbed by him in the whom, so he now has the strength of a grown man and a small baby. Pam then shared this tragic story about her aunt, who was a talent female boxer. She ended up being injured in a fight and was paralyzed from it, and ultimately she asked her manager to remove her breathing tube so she could die. It was then Ryan who talked about the time he and his family were on safari in Africa when his cousin, Mufasa, was trampled by a herd of wildebeest. He didn’t go into too much detail because he said it would take about an hour and a half to do it justice. Finally, Kevin talked about the time they were hosting a party over the weekend when his uncle Bernie died, and he was forced to pretend like he was still alive. It was about here that Michael realized people were simply using movie plots as their stories. This is also when we start to piece out that the reason he is so upset is because he is seeing himself as Ed Truck. That one day he will die and that no one will miss him or mourn his death. Toby does try to step in to calm him down, and he tries to rationalize how death is a part of life because he had just seen a bird that morning which ran into a window and died. In an effort to make a difference, Michael speeds out to find and attempt to help him.

In the end, Michael is unable to save the bird but does decide he is going to host a funeral for that bird at 4pm. It is quite moving with he explains that this bird died alone and it is important to take the time to honor him. Most of us were sort of on the fence about it but Pam had come around to a lot of us to encourage that we come out and take some time for it. The service was quite sweet because Pam took some time to talk about the bird, although it was apparent she was trying to remind Michael that he is not alone in this world. The service was formally closed out with Dwight’s recording playing, a bit of singing from Pam, and sending the bird out in flames.

I know we like to think of Michael as one who is quick to get emotional or overreact but he did tap into something that many of us think about at one time or another. It is human nature to fear that one day we will die and no one will remember us. We all want to leave our mark in this world and I feel many of us are always trying to find a means to ensure that we are remembered. This might be starting a company, having children, authoring a paper or book, anything which ensures that if we were to die then our name might live on just a little bit longer. It is humbling to think about the fact that one day we will die and eventually no one will remember us or know our name.

Certainly a bit of a downer to leave on but that was what all happened at the office! We began with a stair gag and ended with a funeral for a bird; like Pam pointed out, you never really know what the day will bring here at the office. For those of you who have had suffered grief and loss, do you have any words of wisdom for those dealing with that? Advise on what can actually be done to help process those emotions and ultimately reach a state of acceptance? Here is to having a slightly more positive topic next week but life isn’t always about jokes or silly antics. There are times we do have to deal with the cold reality that we cannot always control everything. One thing we can control, is taking the time to talk to one another around the Breakroom and take a small reprieve from the everyday. Until next time, watch out for me around the Breakroom.

  1. Holland, K. (2023, May 17). The Stages of Grief and What to Expect. Healthline. Retrieved May 2, 2024, from https://www.healthline.com/health/stages-of-grief ↩︎
Posted in Uncategorized

The Office: Season 3, Episode 3 “The Coup”

Posted on by Nathan Westerberg

Good morning everyone and welcome back to the Breakroom! I hope you have all had a great week. On my end, I feel like I am starting to sense that people are very anxious to go into summer. Everyone is out the moment there is a little bit of sun and remotely warm, my dogs are shedding their coats all over the house, and I’m seeing plenty of out-of-towners in town with their giant vehicles taking up parking places. But what is a better way to countdown to summer than in office breakdowns, right? After today, we will officially hit summer in eight more breakdowns. Let us get this number going, and jump into everything that happened this week at the office.

Well, the biggest event really happened on Monday, first thing in the morning even. As you might recall, Michael has come up with a new idea on how to prevent those nasty cases of “the Mondays” by setting up videos for us to watch Monday morning. This particular Monday, we are picking up with Varsity Blues since the best cure for Monday Blues is Varsity Blues. Originally this idea started with us watching through the different training videos that Dunder Mifflin offered, followed by a medical video (thinking the ones they showed in school on our changing bodies). Since then it has been segments of movies each Monday, with the exception of an episode of Entourage that he had us watch six different times.

This topic certainly brings up the fact that many of us who work Monday through Friday jobs do get to feel that “case of the Mondays” when we come in after a nice weekend. Mind you, I feel many people might have their own version of a weekend depending on how their schedule works (my husband’s weekend would be Sunday and Monday) so many of us are familiar with this sensation. So reaching out to the experts, what can we do to help shake of those cobwebs that infest the work side of our brain?

Calm offers a full breakdown of the Monday Blues, including talking about the main symptoms which can include a lack of energy, anxiety, and just simple moodiness. So what causes us to go through these symptoms? There are a few reasons, certainly the biggest is simply going from a period of freedom and doing whatever we want back to our job where we have duties that are not necessarily fun, simply gets to us. It can certainly be a sign that you are unhappy with your job but for many people their job isn’t necessarily their life’s passion they’ve dreamt of doing their entire life, so it is understandable they’d rather being doing one of their hobbies. Additionally, it could have more to do with they actually did on the weekend. It is pretty easy to want to do so much over the weekend that sleep and rest becomes such a low priority, that you make up for it starting Monday when you need to go back to a routine. That last one is my biggest issue when I take days off for long weekends, I end up staying up too late because I don’t need to sleep right away and I pay for it later. So what does Calm suggest we do? Well one of them is exactly what Michael is trying to do and that is creating a ritual or tradition on Mondays. Just like we have a tradition of looking forward to the weekend, having a Monday routine assists in that transition back into the work week. Perhaps you do a weekly trip to your favorite coffee place for a special drink to start out the week or perhaps you schedule listening to the latest episode of your favorite podcast. Similarly, they recommend starting the week with a meditation or workout routine which can good to maintain your mood and energy levels. Rather than the start of the work week, you can focus on the days throughout it. You can take some time to focus on some self-care like a bubble bath or treat yourself to a special dessert. You can also focus setting up evening to do activities such as a movie night or perhaps you spend an evening on your favorite hobby like crocheting or blogging1.

Forbes also discussed the phenomenon of Monday Blues, and they want to call out the fact that these rough Monday’s are not necessarily about the fact that you are transitioning from weekend to work week. They talk about how it could be a serious indicator that one is unhappy with their current job, since if you love what you do then going to work Monday just means you get to continue to do what makes you happy. I do personally want to disagree with this statement a bit. First, it is certainly possible to love your career but it doesn’t change the fact that you would love to have a nice long weekend without having to think about work. Second, not everyone is in a situation where they can “do what they love” and it is best for them to stay in a job that they just simply do not like. Maybe there are just not great job opportunities around or perhaps their ideal career is not one they can focus on full-time. Careers in the arts can take a great deal of time to achieve the ability to do it without a “day job.” So for those of you out there working a job that you just don’t care about, there is nothing wrong with working for the weekend because your job is simply a means to focus on your hobbies and personal time. So remember, not everyone gets to work a job that they look forward to every Monday morning. I think we all remember how long Chandler Bing had to work in his boring job before he finally found something he could be excited about. And for some people, it really is about making money to focus on your what makes you happy outside of work. So what are some of Forbes’s tips for preparing for Monday? They do recommend remembering to get proper rest over the weekend, so try to refrain from that excessive sleeping in. I usually split the difference and sleep in one day while getting up at my usual time the other day. Another they mention which I liked was about positivity and how it can help to keep yourself in a positive attitude. I typically do this by either listening to my favorite podcast or playing with my puppies for a bit always cheers me up. Another is to make someone else happy; working in human resources there are those instances where I am able to help someone and actually feel good afterwards. I find that verbally saying “they were really nice” or “that was actually a good call” helps to cement the fact that I was able to walk away happy. Additionally, much like how Calm talks about setting up plans throughout the week it can be as simple as having a plan for after work and give you something to look forward to. Today, for instance, my husband and I decided to order from OMC Smokehouse (a local favorite here in Duluth) and the thought of their famous brisket and beef fat fries definitely put me in a good mood. more importantly, it helps act as a goal or reward for being able to get through your work day2. So while we might all have some serious Monday Blues, that doesn’t mean we can’t try to combat them with focusing on other aspects of our lives besides work.

Unfortunately, upper management is not always so keen about employees doing these sorts of activities while they are on the job and Jan Levinson is no exception. She had chose to swing by Monday morning for a visit and she went ballistic with Michael when she found out that this is what he has been doing Monday mornings with everyone. While I personally think it is one of his better ideas, Michael doesn’t always translate his reasoning very well so it came off as a poor idea. Interestingly enough, Stamford also has their own tool to mix up the day. Jim explained to me they all like to play Call of Duty in the office. Seems it started as a team building exercise but they now have designated times during the day as a motivational tool. Jan is aware that they do this and really supports the idea. This really makes me start to think it’s more the fact that Jan simply has a problem with Michael and is just looking for reasons to criticize him.

Well, as it turns out there was one other person who was looking for a reason to tear Michael down. Dwight suddenly had to disappear for an emergency dental procedure, he needed to get a crown put on. Michael didn’t think anything of this, but he would soon find out that his trusted Assistant (to the) Manager was planning a coup of his position. Dwight actually set up a meeting with Jan after she left the office to convince her that Michael was inept for his job and that Dwight held the key to rebuilding the branch. Now Dwight is a bit of a loose cannon and can be very odd, much like Michael, but he is potentially the only person who takes this company more seriously than Michael. Jan went right around and actually passed this information to Michael, so he actually chose to set up a trap to get Dwight to admit to us all of his treachery. Michael informed us all that Dwight was selected to replace him and that we needed to respect his loyalty (since that is all it takes to be manager) and he wanted for Dwight to break. Michael wasn’t able to last as long, however, and began to reduce Dwight to a crying mess in front of us all because of how he betrayed him. We definitely lost a bit of respect for him that day, for more reasons than one.

But Michael still chose to forgive him since he is such a great guy. That, and Dwight is to do his laundry for the next year and he decided to publicly shame him with a “Liar” sign he had to wear. What I do not get is why Jan was so quick to turn Dwight in rather than consider him for a higher role. It is no secret that Jan has problems with Michael, and was went off at him just that morning for being poor at his job. We’ve spent over a year trying to prevent downsizing and although Dwight is an odd duck (to say the least) he does take his job and the company very seriously. He is even the top salesman of the entire company, so you’d think Jan would want to use him to help save the branch. Certainly makes you wonder what is going through Jan’s mind when she is so hard on Scranton but is through the moon for the Stamford branch.

And that was the craziness that happened on Monday in how we went from an early morning movie to finding a traitor in our midst. I personally have never had an instance where I tried to replace my boss, but I have to say it takes a special type of person to try to do that to a boss you actually adore and look up to. On the brightside, we do have some new ideas for how to combat the Monday Blues. I like the idea of developing a Monday morning tradition so I will think on fun things that I can do. Perhaps doing a “doughnut Monday” where I have a nice pastry waiting for me as a breakfast treat. Do any you out there have your own methods of dealing with your case of the Mondays? Please comment below and let us all know!

Until next time, I hope you have a great weekend and I’ll be sure to see you around the Breakroom.

  1. (n.d.). 8 ways to beat the Monday blues and have a better workweek. Calm. Retrieved April 25, 2024, from https://www.calm.com/blog/monday-blues ↩︎
  2. Smith, J. (2013, February 25). 11 Ways to Beat the Monday Blues. Forbes. Retrieved April 25, 2024, from https://www.forbes.com/sites/jacquelynsmith/2013/02/25/11-ways-to-beat-the-monday-blues/?sh=8d8ecd423f5c ↩︎
Posted in Uncategorized

Coffee Break: Retirement

Posted on by Nathan Westerberg

Good morning everyone and TGIF! After taking a couple days off earlier this week, it has been a bit of playing catch up so rather than doing a full breakdown, I wanted to do one of my patented Coffee Breaks.

So what is today’s topic? Well, I just came back from the retirement party for one of my coworkers so I thought retirement was a pretty good topic to bring up! So retirement, the inevitable dream that we all have of one day being able to achieve because it means that rather than waking up to head into the office for the ol’ 9 to 5, we can focus on our hobbies. Unfortunately, the news is always talking about how people are working later because they often do not have enough saved up to be able to afford not working anymore. At the same time, we are seeing the ultra wealthy and powerful working long after retirement age despite having more than enough funds to be able to retire. How many politicians are there working long past their retirement age because they simply cannot just let go. Or what about those who simply make such large amounts of monies but they choose to continue to work and accumulate more and more funds. If I had the sort of money that Musk or Bezos had, I would disappear. I would no longer work, I’d stay out of the media cycles, and focus on things that bring me joy. They say work makes them happy, but I think we can all agree they are only doing it because they like to feel powerful. No one accumulates that much wealth when they feel happy with themselves.

So focusing on real Americans, what are the current retirement statistics? For starters, the current retirement age is 66 for those born between 1943 and 1954; for those born after 1960 it is 67. While you can certainly choose to retire earlier than that but these ages have to do with when you can begin claiming the most in Social Security. When you retire early, you take a reduced amount so this really when come down to your personal finances. I cannot stress enough, it is important to have a financial advisor who can assist with these sorts of questions.

Many of us have retirement accounts, most often in the for of a 401(k) but there are many other options. So let us say you have a 401(k), how much should we have in this account when we retire? This is a pretty broad question and certainly comes down to how early you retire, do you have a significant other who also has an account, what are you personal expenditures, etc… Well according to Bankrate, when you choose to retire they actually recommend having at least 10-years worth of your current salary saved up in your 401(k) which can seem very daunting to say the least.1 Additionally, they provide the average and median breakdowns of 401(k) accounts based on ages, as seen below:

Where do you do you place for your age group? Without going into my actual information I can say that I am 34 but I did not actually start a 401(k) account until the age of 25 when I joined my current company and that had this as an option. Unfortunately, most people in their 20s are not concerned with thinking about saving up for retirement. But a decade later I realize that I still have to work another 30-years and then hope that I have enough saved up. Or maybe I will get lucky and come into a lot of money where I can sort of disappear and enjoy myself.

So for those out there, regardless of your age group, what are your retirement tips for us saving and trying to get there? Do you have a side hustle that funds your retirement? Or are you one of those you saves a lot early on so you can enjoy it later? Or do you simply have a saving account rather than a 401(k) to avoid those penalties should you wish to access those funds? Feel free to share below in the comments!

With my coffee about done and needing to get back to my desk, I want to thank you for swinging by for this Coffee Break. I’ll have a full Breakdown for you this next week, and as always I’ll be sure to see you around the Breakroom.

  1. Baker, B., & Whelehan, B. (2024, February 6). The average 401(k) balance by age. Bankrate. Retrieved April 18, 2024, from https://www.bankrate.com/retirement/average-401k-balance-by-age/#:~:text=Fidelity%20says%20by%20age%2060,k)%20balance%20should%20be%20%24800%2C000. ↩︎
Posted in Uncategorized

The Office: Season 3, Episode 2 “The Convention”

Posted on by Nathan Westerberg

Good morning everyone, thank you so much for stopping by the breakroom! We are officially back to Spring Round 2 here in Minnesota. Our spontaneous blizzard has all melted, the weather is in the 60s, and we are hopeful that this time it sticks. We even have had several instances of rain this week. That’s right, while most of American was watching the eclipse earlier this week, I got to look outside at a cloudy sky while it was raining on top of the last bit of snow and ice on the ground. But I saw plenty of pictures of it online so that was good enough for me. In fact my entire Facebook feed seemed to be eclipse-related and it eventually it go to the point where all I could think about was:

But I digress, I certainly do not want to be a Negative Nelly about it all. So instead, why don’t we talk about what happened here at the office today?

As usual, Michael came in hot because he was excited to share his life-changing news with Pam; he was going to be father! No, he did not get his girlfriend pregnant. Instead, he was inspired by seeing Angelina Jolie talking to Oprah about how amazing her life had become after she adopted her child from China. So much so that he made the decision he wanted to do the same, so he asked Pam to get the necessary information for him. I don’t think we truly appreciate Pam for all that she has to put up with in her job. I will remind you all that she is the office receptionist. But on top of all that, Michael likes to treat her like she is his own personal assistant. You might have noticed she has been tasked with much more than usual ever since Ryan was made a full sales employee. Since he doesn’t have a temp that must do everything he says, Pam gets to be tasked with these sorts of requests. Thankfully, Pam already was relatively versed with this topic because Roy’s sister had actually considered it. Not only does the application fee run around $1,000 but there can a wait lasting close to eight months. Not only was this more expensive than he anticipated (again, this is just the application fee) but he doesn’t even know if he’d still want a child in eight months. Determined he wanted a guarantee of a child, he was able to talk Pam into agreeing to having a child with him in 30 years, providing neither of them are married. Personally, I think Pam decided that if she truly was still alone in that time, she could put up with Michael.

I was curious about these fees and wait times associated with adoptions so I did do some quick research. According to Family Equality, Pam was not kidding that adoption can be very expensive. There are actually three styles of adoption, and each has their own costs. The least expensive is Foster-to-Adopt in which you begin as a foster parent and then choose to adopt. These often run less than $2,600 and can even be free since they go through the public child welfare system. Next is the Domestic Adoption, where you choose to adopt from within the United States and typically range from $20,000 to $45,000. Finally, the International Adoption (which Michael was looking at) often range from $30,000 to $70,000. Technically there is the Second or Step Parent Adoptions but those have to do with formally adopting non-biological children, like if your were marrying someone who already had children. There are many factors that go into calculating the costs associated such as lawyer fees, the adoption agency you work with, and even any travel associated to other states or countries1. Many companies do offer benefits for those looking to adopt, including parental leave, so it is beneficial to look into what your company offers. The wait time can be even more broad with the wait being several months to even a year. Again, there are many factors that go into this but my understanding is the greatest wait can be for those looking to adopt an infant. While many people dream of adopting a young baby, let us not forget how many children and even teenagers are stuck in the system and would love to have a place to call home. For those looking to adopt, I urge you to consider older children who are just as eager to be adopted.

With this potential crisis averted, we can focus on our actual work day. So Michael and Dwight are actually not sticking around today! They are heading to Philadelphia for the annual Northeastern Mid-Market Office Supply Convention. It is a big deal for companies like ours to get in touch with these other companies, make connections and possibly get some new business. But they are not the only representatives for Dunder Mifflin because they will be meeting up with Josh and Jim from Stamford and then Jan from corporate. I could tell that Michael seemed to be very on edge about the whole trip. Besides having to deal with Jan and their past “relationship” this will be the first time he has seen Jim since he left and he has some pretty negative emotions towards Josh because of the transfer. Well, true to form Michael has a dedicated check list to go over all of this packing. They were only going for a couple nights but I have mad respect for a travel checklist. I personally take packing very seriously and will do checklists to ensure that I get everything I need. My husband went to Florida for a work training a couple months ago and I personally took care of his packing. He didn’t even ask, I simply took over the whole thing and made sure he was fully packed. Of course, it would’ve been about the time he was on the plane that I realized I forgot to send him with a travel umbrella. That is why you do a checklist, because even when you do there is that chance that one thing will slip your mind.

And they were off, I don’t know everything that happened but I did hear that in the end it was a pretty good trip. Michael was stoked about all of the swag that he got to pick up. So much, in fact, that he was planning on decorating his entire condo with the free swag they got from all of the vendors. He did get annoyed with Josh, and even had Dwight try to dig up some good dirt on him that he could use to torpedo his chances of absorbing the branch. Unfortunately, it sounds like Dwight’s “contact” he has wasn’t available so they weren’t able to come up with anything. For the record, I have never actually tried to dig dirt up on a colleague in an attempt to destroy their career. That being said, with so many people putting their entire lives on social media it is surprisingly easy to catch people compared to in the past. But left to his own devices, Michael was successful in arranging a deal with Hammermill so we could now offer their products to our customers. Considering that they were previously exclusive with Staples, I think this shows that Michael is a lot more capable than we often give him credit for. Even better, I hear he was able to patch things up with Jim so they are back on good terms. I guess Michael seemed to think Jim left Scranton because he thought Josh was the better boss. That doesn’t seem to be the case so there are no hard feelings between those two.

What did we do here in Scranton with Michael and Dwight gone? As it turns out, our office seems to run pretty smoothly with them gone so everything was business as usual. Did we perhaps slack off just a bit more with the bosses gone? Sure, but everyone does that. Especially since Angela also left and she is normally the stickler that doesn’t let anyone get away that sort of nonsense. Strange coincidence she left the same day as them, very odd. Our only really exciting news was Pam agreed to go on a double date with Kelly, Ryan and a friend of theirs who is a local cartoonist for the paper. I think Kelly thought that because Pam is really into art, that they might hit off. I had a hunch it wouldn’t be a love connection, this was her first date after being Roy since high school and the general rule is you need to get a couple of awkward dates under your belt as you put yourself back out there.

And that was pretty much all that happened here around the office, overall a pretty chill day with the boss away! I am jealous about not getting to go to that convention because I am crazy for getting to buy office supplies. Where does everyone like to get their favorite supplies? Predominately, I am either OfficeMax for in-person shopping or else I do love my Amazon. Does anyone have specific items that they are tied to a set brand? I have two personal favorites, notebooks and pens. For notebooks, I am obsessed with the brand Black n’ Red which can be found at both Amazon as well as OfficeMax. It might be a bit more expensive but I feel they are great quality, and they have a professional look to them so they are excellent to carry into a meeting. For pens, I only like to use Tul in 1.0 MED when available; again, these can be found at both OfficeMax and Amazon. Besides having a great look to them, they also have just the right feel in my end. While not everyone might be so specific with notebooks and pens, I feel we all have at least one thing that we need to have a specific brand or model of, otherwise we feel off. So please, feel free to list your favorite office supply down below in the comments!

I hope you all get a chance to enjoy the great weather this weekend, and if I don’t see you around the office I’ll make it a point to say hi to you around the breakroom!

  1. (n.d.). Average Adoption Costs in the United States. Family Equality. Retrieved April 11, 2024, from https://familyequality.org/resources/average-adoption-costs-in-the-united-states/ ↩︎
Posted in The Office

The Office: Season 3, Episode 1 “Gay Witch Hunt”

Posted on by Nathan Westerberg

Good morning everyone and welcome back to the breakroom! We have had a very big day and I have a lot to catch you up on. So why don’t we do a “this could’ve been an email” and skip the pleasantries so we can get to the highlights of the day!

Starting with the biggest change that happened while you were away, we have actually had a couple changes in employees. Jim accepted a promotion at our Stamford branch in Connecticut, so he has officially left Scranton. While I get that he got a better position, it still seemed pretty out-of-the-blue in that it came out almost right after Casino night. Still not sure what happened that night but he seemed pretty odd ever since that night. But with that position open, Michael formally hired Ryan into Jim’s position. He is officially a fulltime employee, no longer just the temp. Now that he sits at the desk clump with Dwight, I believe he is quickly realizing that it was not everything he may have dreamed about. For starters, I saw Dwight was clipping his nails at his desk and I don’t know how Ryan kept his cool. People, do not cut your nails at work because that is just disgusting to stumble across a random nail at work. If you do insist on doing so, do it in private where no one will have any idea that you clipped them at work. But aside from a nail emergency, just wait until you get home.

I’m one of the few people who has kept in contact with Jim (even Pam hasn’t talked to him lately) and it sounds like he enjoying himself. He’s closer to New York City so there is a lot most going on, but he is still trying to figure himself out with his colleagues. I guess he got a nickname on his first day, Big Tuna; he ate a tuna fish sandwich for lunch, so it’s not necessarily the most creative name. But otherwise he is still getting used to the changes but is optimistic about it.

Perhaps the only thing crazier than Jim actually choosing to leave our branch, is the gossip surrounding Pam and Roy. Only days before the wedding, she got cold feet and called off their wedding! No one seems to know what happened, because this also seems to have come out of left field. They were together since high school and Pam finally got Roy to commit to a date so it is pretty wild this happened the way it did. One rumor was that Pam supposedly had feelings for someone else, but I haven’t been able to confirm anything. She seems to be doing okay, considering the circumstances. She got her own apartment, is currently taking art classes to work on her craft, and because they had to pay for the wedding food she has lunch for the next five weeks already planned. Roy is taking it a bit harder, he actually went on a bit of a bender and was arrested following the break up. He taking care of himself more but he is determined to try to win Pam back. Personally, I always thought they got caught up in that “high school sweethearts” scenario and that it is healthier to get out there to meet other people. It really would help put things into perspective and allow them to decide what they want for the future.

Now that you’re all caught up with what happened while you were out, time to tell you what actually happened today. Well, it started off with Michael getting a scolding by Toby (personally he could’ve been more serious) because he had called Oscar “faggy.” Evidently, the scenario was he called Oscar this because he said he liked Shakespeare In Love more than Die Hard. For those who do not understand, you should never be referring to anyone as “faggy” and this also falls under the umbrella of words like “fag”, “faggot”, “homo”, or the derogatory variation of “gay.” All of these words, and more, fall into the realm of homophobic language and is considered very serious and can be considered hate speech. As a gay man, I can tell you that these terms are nothing new because I believe I first was called these when I was 11 or 12. I was tempted to find some sort of article or piece of information but no, I do not feel that preventing bigotry from entering the workplace really needs any sort of explanation. There really is no reason to bring words which are derogatory terms for people in general but than includes races, sexual orientations, and identities. My mom taught me as child to remember Thumper from Bambi in that he was taught “if you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all.” If a child can learn to respect people, an adult can learn to do so, too. So if you feel the need to say “faggy,” perhaps you should just shut it.

Now all Toby needed to do was reprimand Michael about using language like this, but he also felt the need to let him know that the reason Oscar is so offended is because he truly is gay. Eventually Michael figures out that Toby isn’t making a joke, and his mind is completely blown. Evidently, he thinks it is okay to call people “faggy” as long as they are not gay. Looping back above, you are still making a comment that homosexuality is something that can be insulted and made fun of. Just. Shut. It. Michael perhaps should have invited Oscar into his office and had a private conversation to apologize. Instead, he decided to have this conversation right near the accounting desk so Angela and Kevin were able to hear the entire thing and they very quickly figured out what was going on. And with that, Oscar is formally outted to the office.

This gets back to Jan at corporate and she even drove all the way down to explain the severity of this with Michael. It went about as well as expected. As I mentioned, I am a gay man so I feel lucky in that I can offer an “expert opinion” on these facts. For those who are unfamiliar, “coming out” refers to the act of an individual formally disclosing their sexual orientation as something other than heterosexuality. To be “outted” instead refers to when someone else choose to disclose this information publicly. In this scenario, Michael let it be known to others in the office that Oscar was gay, before he could tell them himself. That being said, Toby was the one who told Michael. I still do not know why Toby thought he could trust Michael, and I really do believe it was truly necessary. I firmly believe and wish that every person can find the strength to come out. But it really is an important moment for them and being forced out never really works out well. While some of us are lucky to find support, there are plenty of people who might be kicked out by their parents, have to endure further bullying at their school, or even be sent to a conversion camp, or similar. Our preferences are nothing to be ashamed about, and cannot be changed simply because you tell us to “pray the gay away.” Too many members of the GLBTAQI2S+ community suffer depression because of this lack of support and it is a travesty that in 2024 these things still happen. And this isn’t just kids in school, but adults also feel the need to treat their colleagues terribly just because they do not “believe” in homosexuality. For the record, these people can be called bigots. No need to play around with words because if someone is treating other people terribly just because they might be gay, transgendered, or even have a different race than their own, please call them out. And they should be reported as a homophobe, racist, bigot, etcetera. To often, people get away with their actions but we need to find our voices and reach out to the appropriate parties at our place of business to ensure these people are reported.

So Jan has tasked Michael with making this situation right, and I have to call out Jan because I do not know why she thought he could fix this. Michael takes us through the history of the word “gay” because it used to mean happy, and then it meant lame, and now it means homosexuality. Well, Oscar is livid having to be forced to come out at work and then put up with Michael’s stupidity as well as Angela’s homophobic comments. He is completely ready to quit because he doesn’t want to stay at a company that treats their employees like this. Michael’s solution is to embrace him, and force a kiss upon him. For the record, all we’ve ever wanted was simple equality and to be treated like everyone else.

The day sort of concludes from that; Oscar is officially out for the next three months for paid vacation. All he had to do was agree not to sue Dunder Mifflin and he gets a company car as well as this paid vacation (he’s going to Europe). Word got back to Jim in Stamford and he arranged for a delivery for Dwight of “Gaydar” be made. It was actually a metal detector, although I’m not sure if he ever figured this out. For the record, “gaydar” refers to that six sense of being able to tell if someone is gay or straight. On a bit of happier news, Phyllis announced she is engaged to Bob Vance. Congratulations Phyllis!

So that was what happened today! A lot of big changes, all leading up to some craziness in the office which concluded with Oscar being forced out of the closet. So what have we learned today? I think it can be summed up as: don’t be a bigot, bigots suck. As for those people who “just don’t get it” I want to reiterate that being gay (or any part of the community) really has no bearing on your life. We do not take away from your life or make your marriage any less special. If you don’t like it, just shut it.

For those out there currently questioning your sexuality, there are many resources out there and I hope you are able to find support. But please know that you are not alone; even if you do not have the support at home, you have support in this world. More than anything I feel the need to bring up that if any of you feel depressed and even suicidal because of your feelings, please consider reaching out to The Trevor Project at https://www.thetrevorproject.org/. You can message them, text them, or even give them a call 24/7. I first put their number in my phone when I was 15, and while it never came to the point that I needed to call them, I had it just in case. Being part of the GLBTAQI2S+ community is never a bad thing, and is never a reason to face discrimination in any parts of your life. Stand up for yourself and please find support; as someone who has routinely been the “token gay” wherever I went, you are absolutely worth it.

I would love to hear from any of my fellow members of the community, so please reach out in the comments! Even better, if you have any resources for readers who are struggling with discrimination or simply figuring themselves out, please share. I often see online where people ask why our community is always so quick to voice our support for any actor, athlete, or cultural icon becomes associated with the LBGT+. Simply put, we support each other so innately because we know what it is like for no one else to. We lift each other up because we know what it is like to feel weighed down and alone. If I can offer any other advice to anyone who is trying to figure out what they can do for a friend or colleague who just came out, do not ever let them feel less than a person.

I hope you all have a great Friday, please feel free to say hi to me around the breakroom, and lets try to get out there and make the world just a little bit better.